St. Elmo’s Fire: Please tell me the real world’s not like this

Rating: 1.5 stars (out of 4)


There’s probably no more definitive “Brat Pack” movie than St. Elmo’s Fire, which looks as though it’s tried to find screen time for as many of them as possible.  Yet, in terms of quality, one would be much better off locating The Breakfast Club, About Last Night or, really, just about anything else Blockbuster has to offer, for Fire will provide nothing more than some vague nostalgia trip that one might feel from seeing 20somethings pine after their college days.  Pretty much everyone involved in this atrocity exhibition has been better somewhere else, including director Joel Schumacher (A Time to Kill, The Client), which is both uplifting and discouraging to consider as the film plays.

A true ensemble piece with no main character, Fire chronicles a group of seven friends who have just graduated college at Georgetown and enter the “real world” without a clue of how to handle it.  The back cover does a solid job of explaining each person’s role (indeed, it’s more promising than the movie itself).  Billy (Rob Lowe) is the only father of the group, but he acts as though he’s 100% single.  He’s being pursued (sort of) by the shy Wendy (Mare Willingham), whose college roommate Jules (Demi Moore) discourages the interest but otherwise has her own life to screw up.  Meanwhile, Leslie (Ally Sheedy) tries to maintain a relationship with Alec (Judd Nelson), who makes astounding lies about his level of commitment.  Finally, Kirby (Emilio Estevez) and Kevin (Andrew McCarthy) room together and deal with their own separate issues with love.

Many of their problems are intertwined with the others’, which forms an intriguing promise that unfortunately is wholly botched.  The film does a lot of telling, too little showing, and asks viewers to fill in gaps.  We can’t get involved with the characters because, though we hear what they’re going through, we never experience it.  We don’t see why Kirby likes the older woman he knew from college, Dale, (Andie MacDowell) or why Wendy likes Billy, and so we don’t care what happens with them.  Everything seems to come out of nowhere, such as Kevin’s sudden interest in Alec’s girl Leslie (after the film has done an amateurish job of giving him blatant anti-love dialogue), Billy’s random dinner with Wendy’s family, or his late move to New York that requires a group hug-fest as he boards the train.

Fire, to its downfall, is filled with so many scenes that, by bearing no semblance to reality, are impossible to relate to.  There’s a bizarre casualness to Billy’s DUI accident at the film’s opening, which gets brushed aside because the victim has a crush on him.  For his part, Kirby crashes a party Dale is attending, soaking wet from stalking her in the rain and looking patently absurd, and yet she talks to him normally and takes him back to her apartment, without requiring any kind of explanation, as though that sort of thing happens all the time.  There’s also a horrendous scene at the group’s hangout spot (St. Elmo’s bar, naturally), where Billy’s wife intentionally takes another man there to irritate him, causing him to declare that all baby boys should be neutered (?!), before Billy and the missus reunite with a “passionate” embrace in front of a gathering crowd.  Awful, awful, awful.  Nothing in that sequence made sense for any of the characters; it was all contrived plot points, and those didn’t even feel real.

No conflicts in this movie are dealt with in the manner that they should have been.  Take Kevin’s interest in his best friend’s girl.  Why and when did he start liking her?  We have no idea.  Was he feeling any kind of internal conflict or hesitation about stealing Alec’s possible fiancé?  Beats me.  Are we supposed to believe that he betrayed his friend?  Who knows.  And then afterwards, he and Alec don’t actually discuss the matter, as would happen in a mature and intelligent movie; they just have a couple of predictable, yawn-inducing fights and then kiss and make up for no apparent reason (other than the make sure the gang is back together by the end).

That also applies for the supposed “conflict” Wendy feels about her father wanting her marry someone she doesn’t like.  We never hear any kind of sophisticated thoughts about this, just a couple of pat lines and then the inevitable decision that we couldn’t care less about.  Likewise, though everyone seems very concerned about the behavior of Wendy, Jules, and to some extent Kevin, no one matters to do anything about Billy (witness the aforementioned DUI that bothers his friends less than him losing a job).  His behavior towards Jules in one scene in a car is inappropriate, but we can’t really be expected to buy her pain.  When she’s the selfish head case that she is, hearing her say “You break my heart, Billy.  But then again, you break everyone’s heart” with a sad-puppy face rings utterly hollow.

God, this movie annoyed the snot out of me.  Even the title and tagline don’t make sense!  The group hardly ever hangs out at St. Elmo’s (not even close to as important as the bar in About Last Night), and what’s up with “You can always count on your friends. [Even when one sleeps with your girlfriend two hours after you break up?] Don’t ever let the fire go out.” [??]

The actors, for their part, provide expressions that are universally overcooked and all seem vaguely off-target, further hurting our ability to become invested in their lives.  Since most of them have done better work elsewhere, perhaps the greatest blame lies with Schumacher.  Estevez and Nelson were better in The Breakfast Club, Lowe and Moore in Last Night.  Only the ever-adorable Sheedy gets it all right—her acting, as was the case in Breakfast, still seems achingly genuine, from the heart, and all her own.  (They’ve all looked better too, especially Lowe, saddled with effeminate make-up and an earring, and Moore, hiding her attractiveness behind an awful hairstyle and color that doesn’t work for her.)

By the time of the overwrought conclusions to the storylines (Jules’s attempted suicide, Kirby’s goodbye to his girl), the viewer will likely have lost the energy to be offended.

The Breakfast Club: They can dish it out, but can they take it?

Since this Labor Day represents the unofficial end of summer and start of the school year, it seems the perfect time to explore a beloved–but imperfect–movie about the difficulties teenagers face at school: 1985′s The Breakfast Club.  This also serves as a partial homage to the recently deceased John Hughes, who wrote and directed numerous quality films in the 1980s.  Further explorations of his movies will follow.
The Brat Pack, in all their glory
The Brat Pack, in all their glory

Rating: two 1/2 stars (out of four)

John Hughes’s The Breakfast Clubhas become something of a cult classic in the decades since its 1985 release, equaling or surpassing other pictures from this talented writer, at least in the public’s eye.  In it, five high school students, who conveniently represent a few of their student body’s cliques, have been forced to spend one precious Saturday in detention.  There’s the jock, Andrew (Emilio Estevez); the princess, Claire (Molly Ringwald); the brain, Brian (Anthony Michael Hall); the weirdo, Allison (Ally Sheedy); and the criminal, Bender (Judd Nelson).

As a film, The Breakfast Cluboccupies a critical point in movie history.  The actors were all “Brat Pack” regulars—for Hughes favorite Ringwald, this bracketed Sixteen Candles and Pretty in Pink, and Sheedy, Nelson, and Estevez would star, with others, in the awful St. Elmo’s Fire later the same year.  As Roger Ebert pointed out, it’s an “all-star cast” of younger actors, and the film is worth watching for anyone about to enter high school, but not as much as, say, Mean Girls.  Ultimately, it’s a frustrating, contradictory movie, not nearly as consistent as other Hughes works Sixteen Candles and Ferris Bueller’s Day Off or as heartwarming as Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.   

The stereotypical classifications of the main characters are meant to represent both the way the school principal Richard Vernon (Paul Gleason) and their fellow inmates view them.  The entire movie takes place at school during the day, almost all of that inside the library, where these five challenge each other’s misconceptions of themselves.  Learning tolerance, Hughes tells us, is a lot easier when you want others to view you more sympathetically. 

The de facto leader of the group is Bender, the obnoxious, loud, arrogant, and generally rebellious student who manages to infuriate everyone within about 15 minutes.  Bender, though not uninteresting, is a bit of a contrived character.  Judd Nelson does what he can with the character, and it’s not unrealistic for a high school detention to feature someone like him, but some of his antics feel forced, thrown in by Hughes to keep the plot moving.  

Though I’ll give the movie credit for not going the route of The Graduateby refusing to anoint the adults with first names, it’s difficult to deny that the principal is a hopeless caricature.  I suppose that’s the point, but it makes for quite a one-sided viewpoint.  Some of the things Vernon says to Bender have merit—in particular “You ought to spend a little more time trying to do something with yourself and a little less time trying to impress people.”—but it’s tough to take them seriously when he follows them with a promise to start “cracking skulls” the next time they misbehave.  Likewise, his fighting words to Bender later on in the film feel as out of place as the fight between Richard Gere and Lou Gossett at the end of An Officer and a Gentleman.  Andrew fighting Bender makes sense; the principal taunting him doesn’t.

A more balanced perspective is shown towards the faceless parents of the students.  Though everyone, naturally, professes to not get along with his or hers—If I said that I did, says Andrew, “you’d think I was an idiot.”—they’re not necessarily the problems in the kids’ lives.  Brian, we can infer, has supportive, loving parents; they may be overly concerned about grades, or he may just think they’re overly concerned about grades.  Likewise, Claire doesn’t like her parents, but it becomes clear that she has bigger issues with her friends and her school. 

A little less credible, though, are the personas of Andrew’s father, who demands athletic success from him, or Bender’s, who abuses him.  Those stock types could be believable if the film did something with them, but they’re just slipped in towards the end to try to make us view each person a little more sympathetically.

Hughes adds a few nice touches along the way to keep things interesting.  I admire his willingness to keep the entire film moderately paced, in one setting, with no special effects whatsoever.  I also like the use of music, as the students dance, whistle, or air guitar to the songs playing in the background.  Credit is also due to his inclusion of one of my favorite characters in movies, period, the “weirdo” played by Ally Sheedy.  The film’s most satisfying moments almost all involve her—when she empties her bag onto a couch and explains its contents, when she reveals why she’s in detention (a truly fantastic moment), and when Claire transforms her appearance to uncover physical beauty that had lain dormant.

Unfortunately, the film doesn’t manage to quite transform anyone emotionally quite as much.  Because of its lack of special effects and series of conversations between people attempting to get under the other’s skin, it reminded me in some ways of Closer, but it manages to convey neither that film’s great sense of atmosphere and mood nor its heart.  Closer revealed the emotional breaking points of all of its characters, but nothing in The Breakfast Club strikes that deeply.  My love for Ally notwithstanding, I can’t deny that we don’t really get to know anyone that well. 

And Hughes, though he makes some good choices, adds too many distractions to the story.  In my opinion, the film never should have left the library once the principal put them in there.  By giving us Bender running around the school and needless conversations with the principal and janitor, Hughes ruins the atmosphere of the film.  I liken this to Cast Away, which would have crashed and burned if Robert Zemeckis had ever cut away from Tom Hanks while he was on the island to go back to Memphis.  Hughes spends about 90% of the time in the library and suddenly decides to roam to the principal’s office, the gymnasium, and Bender’s locker; a bolder move would have been to keep the students in one place the whole time.

The Breakfast Club also falters because its writing is not perfectly sharp.  When Claire is berating Bender for his refusal to get involved in the school, she expresses scorn for the academic clubs of which Brian is a member, and Hughes misses the opportunity for Bender to point out the hypocrisy in Claire’s viewpoint.  This is microcosmic of the film’s problems: a few of the conversations that take place are substantive—addressing sex, cliques, popularity, authority—but the movie never really goes anywhere with them.  I never got the impression that the students have learned anything or changed in any meaningful way from their day.  When Claire eventually falls for Bender, for example, it doesn’t feel like something stemming from a change in her attitude towards him; it just feels like a sudden and unexplained plot twist.  There has been little previously to indicate that her feelings for him have softened.    

It may seem as though I dislike this film, but the truth is that I point out its flaws only because it intrigues me so much.  I think it could have been a great film, but instead it’s merely decent.  I love the set-up, and I laugh out loud numerous times in it.  I can relate, at least partially, to Brian, Andrew, and Ally, and Nelson’s Bender eventually turns around from being a mere simpleton to the character least afraid of telling the truth.  His comeback to Claire about supposedly not having any purpose at the school has real bite, and even if his parents represent a bit of a stereotype, Nelson just about makes it work, thanks to his spot-on acting in scenes such as the one when he describes his last Christmas: “It was a banner fucking year at the old Bender family.  I got a carton of cigarettes–the old man grabbed me and said, ‘Hey, smoke up, Johnny.’” 

Such scenes have edginess and power.  Unfortunately, the resolutions are somewhat pat and underdeveloped, which is why The Breakfast Club is best enjoyed with low expectations; otherwise you won’t be able to shake its tentativeness and unwillingness to make a strong statement.  There is a moment when the five students discuss whether they’ll view each other differently come Monday—but I’m not so sure they will.  The likelihood that Hughes is making a statement with that fact is all but impossible.